September 1st

September 1, 2008.

HAPPY LABOR DAY!! To those of you back home! :) I hope you and yours are enjoying a deserved day off from work!

September 1, 2008...

Shortly after waking up this morning, I did as I usually do (I'm not a morning person) and began to catalogue in my head the itineraries for the day...what's going on, what needs to be done, who goes where, what day of the week it is, my surroundings, the date...

THE DATE!!!!! OMG, it's September 1st!!! THANK GOD!!!!!! That was my reaction. Really. Where did that come from?? Half awake...it came straight from my subconscious, that's where! But why?? Since I just don't do mornings very well, I couldn't really think of an answer to that question, but the thought and feelings about it remained...THANK GOD it's September 1st!!! Hmmmm...

As my day progressed, I still couldn't think of any sufficient answers to that question. I must have filed this date away somewhere deep inside a long time ago as a means to an end...or a beginning...or a milestone...or a hurdle jumped...a goal reached...or SOMETHING. All I know is that I'm so happy I reached it! haha Although, I feel I have reached "it" crawling on my knees, all scraped up, head hanging low, reaching towards "it" in desperation, half starving, and completely thirsty...for WHAT, exactly, I don't know. But, I've reached "IT"!!!!! haha Yah for me!!

Ok, ok, ok. I MUST have come up with something, right? Some explanation to these feelings? Well, I think it's a culmination of many different things...ALL, in which I feel, bring me hope to the situation that I have found myself in recently.

ONE!
The kids started their brand new BIG school today!! Yah! :) I really do like the school we chose here in Shanghai and seeing BOTH boys so excited to go to school was really great! We hyped it up all summer long and I felt we released them into a fun, safe, nurturing, and stimulating environment that they BOTH can be happy in for several months (you never know with kiddos - could be days, weeks, months). Their eyes were shining as they met their teachers and integrated themselves to their own classroom environments. BOTH boys immediately began playing with toys and other kids. No separation anxiety. Whew! When I picked them up, they had shining reports from their teachers and the boys' eyes were still sparkling from the experience of their day! Brandon announced he made three new friends! Ryan's teacher couldn't believe Ryan didn't cry once the entire day AND she couldn't believe how much the boy can eat, especially next to his little Chinese counterparts. haha

TWO!
Anyone who knows me, knows I have a lot of difficulty in the heat...and it's been sooooo hot here. September 1st, I think, has been a milestone to begin the countdown to cooler days. It always gets fractionally cooler by the end of September. For someone who is so sensitive to heat, a "fraction" is a huge improvement and can make a BIG difference in everyday living.

THREE!
September 1st offers hope. Renewed vigor. It's the end. End of what? Summer, maybe? My "transitional" period to making this move to China, maybe? I have been "transitioning" for several months now and maybe I tucked into my subconscious that if I can make it to September 1st...there is hope.

FOUR!
Hope for what? Hope that it will get cooler? Hope that me and the kids will FINALLY begin a regular routine now that school has started? Hope that my life settles down a bit. Hope that my Husband will once again become my hero. Hope that I begin to gain something from this experience instead of feel drained from it? Hope that I can find my smile again...

September 1, 2008.

Whether the answers stated above are truth or speculation...I'm not overly concerned...because I'm just so glad it's here.